photo credit: hattiesburgmemory

i was a waiter at olive garden in college

i knew i was at a chain restaurant but knew i could milk the suburban population for all they were worth with my charm, smile, false nametag and scrumptious love handles

i once waited on a radio host from a local AM station and unbeknownst to me (people in the west say unbeknownst, deal with it) the guy was impressed with my witty banter

i continued to wait on my other tables as this dude stopped my manager and talked me up for some reason

now ive had stalker customers in the past that think i remember them when the come in every time, but i was all about serve & boot (get em in, get em out, take they dough yo) so i kept myself detatched from actually falling for people as customers. they were just money to me, tricks if you will.

so the dude left and i discovered a fatty tip and his business card

i pocketed the money and tossed the card in the trash
who wants to go on AM radio anyway?

a few weeks later the guy comes back in, i remember him cause he told my manager i was a great personality and would “go far” in the service industry WANK WANK (im making the jerk off motion with my right hand) not because he was a radio host
he asked me why i didnt call the number on the card like i said i would
i apologized and said i didnt remember being instructed to call and that my “supervisor confiscates all non-cash tips” (which was bullshit)
so he left another card and i again, threw it away

later on that night i get a phone call (actually i got paged and i called my friend back – HELL YEAH 90s!) and he said his mom was listening to the AM station this guy worked at and he was going off about how he had “offered a college student waiter a hand in moving up the radio ladder” and the young man “Taffy” (i always had false nametags as a way to spark conversation, for a few weeks I was Taffy, then i went back to Bartyle or Gregorio or Sunshone *past tense of sunshine*) was unresponsive to his “charitable gesture” and would probably end up working in a dive restaurant for the rest of his life or something

the other day we’re in the car and im searching for a radio station that doesnt come in very well so i can use my fm transmitter for my mp3 player and i hear his voice on a christian radio station that advertises “more of gods music, less talk”

if i wouldve taken his charitable gesture to move up in the radio world, i would be the only atheist at a christian radio station that wouldntve allowed me to talk anyway.

photo credit: dalequetepego

networking is a post from sexy ass GagDragon, are you going to the mall later?

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