GagDragon

sorry, what? 15

jells — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 22:31:38 +0000

she snorted pepto bismal, yes, im not going to repeat myself again

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just venting a widdle

jells — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 15:47:26 +0000

while discussing cock rock…

because i frequent a daycare facility twice daily and squeeze through these gossiping, yet oddly attractive, bitches – when they pop the doors on their trendy vans, which i also recently purchased, they have this shit blaring and encourage their kids to “rock out”, which i am also guilty of, but im pushing my kid onto the shit i like rather than the shit im told to like.
the guitar hero sector of the population is impinging on the awesome aspects of rock music by allowing these people to say things like “im down with buckethead” when they can only say “i cant beat that one buckethead song on hard, it’s fucking hard man”
you aint down with buckethead you fucking coooze! you played a video game, hundreds of times, that doesn’t earn you the right to align yourself with those of us who stood outside the riv in chicago for 7 hours just to hear a version of nottingham lace that would melt the skin off of a mud soaked rhinoceros, you spent your free time tapping colored buttons. you are akin to the DDR queers who big up tiesto.

WHO THE FUCK IS TIESTO??

YOU DESERVE TO WEAR A COCK ON YOUR NOSE FOR ETERNITY YOU FUCKING COCK NOSED SOCCER MOM HAVING FAGASS!

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SHIT! COREY HAIM DIED! tribute:

jells — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 22:37:56 +0000

photo credit: Bree Bailey

tim: oh snap corey haim died. corey corey hallalujah

joel: and holy is his haim

tim: more like a haim duck!!!!!!!!!

joel: we’re brothers man, we have the haim skin tone

tim: its a low down dirty haim

joel: was he on the calgary flhaims

tim: i guess he should have never went to hollywood rather and joined the air force and Haimed High

joel: he must not’ve read the disclhaimer on his bottle of sleeping pillsies

tim: some things just cant be explhaimed

joel: for shaim

tim: wait till we get our haims on you

joel: i was frhaimed!

tim: big daddy haim

joel: he haim he saw he conquered

tim: chaim chaim chaim, chaim of fools

joel: he just behaim a legend

tim: he is haimous

joel: i wonder where he was preghaiming before he went out last night

tim: probably with magician david blhaime

joel: his movies were highly acclhaimed

tim: i just hope he can wash out this sthaim

joel: as long as i can renhaim this filenhaim to something conthaiming the word haim

tim: that shit was flhaim!

joel: i was recently mhaimed by a crazed jack russell terrier

tim:…

joel: when corey haim would go to shake someone’s hand and they would miss it, it was called the Haim Left Hangin, which actually inspired the film Pay It Forward

tim: corey haim is the impetous for the band manheim steamroller. They want to be called manhaim cream stroller but corey objected.

joel: during the battle of 1812, a young irishman by the name of whit mcfiddletwiddlin envisioned a world where two coreys would change the world of cinema with their off color brand of ‘cute’ and ‘absolutely annoying as herpes.’ he wrote down six words on a rock near syracuse, ny: nothing will ever be the haim

tim: corey haim didnt die he now goes by an alter ego he created during the crusades, and is known to the world as Madmen star John Hamm

joel: we have to stop so i can publish this

if we dont

the haim game will continue into the next millenihaim

tim: ha(im) ha(im)

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sorry, what? 14

alaska — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 22:30:57 +0000

im not saying anyone deserves to be eaten by a shark, but come on, the way she was dressed, she was asking for it.

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sorry, what? 13

jells — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 22:30:19 +0000

so am i boxing up this placenta or pitching it?

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