GagDragon

we at gagdragon aren’t the catty type, but we do feel the need to document who our enemies are.

if one of us goes missing, please check out these people listed below first. you can print this page out and check them off one by one, if you still haven’t found us, please check the cheapest bar in a 2 mile radius of our respective homes.

• fans of fela
• the city of detroit
• precocious white children who teach adults about unity under a musical bedding of upbeat motown songs
• salvation army bell ringers with beards and smoking coughs
• anyone who is not at sleep away sports camp and carries their keys on a lanyard
• people who wear whisk whisk workout pants when not in route to or from or presently engaging in workout activities
• the smug look on the face of plus sized models.
• the editors at the saturday evening post and their families
• glenn danzig
• robin trower and his mane of sin
• the state of arizona
• doctors who make their friends call them doctor
• checkout counter employees who chew gum
• people who pour coffee who refer to themselves as baristas
• slack jawed slackers
• white trash people who distance themselves from people they consider white trash, while standing there in juicy sweatpants, a nascar pleather jacket, imitation ugg boots and typing on a sidekick
• both Dharma and Greg, greg isnt so much an enemy as an enemy sympathizer
• people who brag on shows on hbo just because it says “i spend an extra 144 bucks a year on premier cable channels”
• people who still watch boxing
• people who drink energy drinks daily, and find it necessary to wear fashion items depicting their brand of choice, even tho all of those tings taste like horse piss
• anyone who still uses the word epic when describing anything other than tales from homer.
• people who allow their pets to get mange
• sean casey of sean casey animal shelters
• hugh jackman singing, sans claws and/or weapons of awesomeness